.:Mode - merapu:.

Haha..it's seem like nothing much to story about. It's just that I have the mood to get back back blogging while doing some surfing on cook-chilled (my latest project). This is not a specific entry that I planned to..it's just me craving to write craps in here..

Hugh!! *sigh*. bored. wondered. excited. missing. lost.
All these feelings are surrounding me now.

It's now exactly a month after reporting to new place. Mummy complained on the phone last nite. She recalled back my 1st workinghood where I cried everytime she called/I called and she start comparing to where I am now. I just replied with a big grin..and a loud laugh. If only she knew all of these smiles are inspired by them – mak, abah, Ila and adek. I’ll prove to them all that I won’t cry anymore. This is what I am going to do, for the sake of future and family.

The new batch of ROs are all already registered. There are 12 of us, including me. My new circles of friends. All guys except my so-called driver, Fida. We are so far going well with each other probably because some of them I already knew since my uni years. But, this place unites us back and starts befriending with every one.

Ra-ya-nun-dal-wau. It has been months. I just could not bear some of the memories. Even I promised to myself to avoid of thinking them all. Sometimes, the tears are shedding down spontaneously. I just realized when they drop on my hands. It’s weird feeling. When it used to be the very best moment turned to be a nightmare to remember. When used to be our dearest but should be the enemy. Mr. Enemy. Mr E.

I remembered Anem said on our last gathered at Secret Recipe, “soon you’ll hate him..”

I just realized how soft hearted I can be after this things are all happened. I am not evil enough to refer him as Mr E. Mr probably E. haha. At the moment, I must say.

I just discovered my inner true self. Yup, it’s very true. The experience taught you to be more matured. And the more you walk through the journey, the more you’ll discover about yourself. But the very true, is a message from a very caring fren, “the opposite of love is not hatred, but does not care”

Reviewing back every words that is written here, I felt this was very disheartening entry. Oh, cipz, come on! This is not the ends of life!

“Apakah manusia itu mengira bahawa mereka dibiarkan saja mengatakan;”kami telah beriman,”sedangkan mereka tidak diuji?(2) Dan sesungguhnya kami telah menguji orang-orang yang sebelum mereka, maka sesungguhnya Allah mengetahui orang-orang yang benar dan sesungguhnya dia mengetahui orang-orang yang dusta(3)”
Surah Al Ankabut : 2-3

Apakah kamu mengira bahwa kamu akan masuk surga, padahal belum datang kepadamu (cobaan) sebagaimana halnya orang-orang terdahulu sebelum kamu? Mereka ditimpa oleh malapetaka dan kesengsaraan, serta digoncangkan (dengan bermacam-macam cobaan) sehingga berkatalah Rasul dan orang-orang yang beriman bersamanya: "Bilakah datangnya pertolongan Allah?" Ingatlah, sesungguhnya pertolongan Allah itu amat dekat.
Surah Al Bakarah:124

Comments

[JiaYu]

Hi..I really dunno the 1st job was your nightmare. Anyway..I m glad that u make a good decision - chose to leave....^_^...hahahha..Happy Always ya...

[Athirah]

Cipah dear!

remember ur resolutions in the previous entry: u can avoid thinking of them.

Jgn sesedih ye.. cheer up!

But I know how hard it gonna be to forget it.

All we can do is to keep remember ; Allah will always be with us.

Hope u'll heal soon. Maybe when u find someone who appreciate u more .

[cippzzy]

eyp jessica, never hate my 1st job. instead am so grateful actually. it was just kinda of not-my-place

[cippzzy]

thir,
trying my best.
healing soon hopefully doesn't matter meet someone new or not.